It's been such a tumultuous day, and it's only 4:35 pm. I'm at a supreme point of exhaustion. I get a letter in the mail from my financial adviser saying that I haven't turned in my Parent's 2006 signed 1040 Federal Tax Return, Parent's 2006 W-2's, and Student's 2006 W-2's..
W T F!@#@#
I don't even want to think about it. I'm in this zone where i feel like I should just say forget it and withdraw from attendance. I Just want to go outside and kick bricks or something. Then pull each strand of hair out of my head from frustration.
I'm lying though. i'm not sadistic or into pain at all, so I'll just pray and stick it through.
I have however mailed in all of those forms. These constant roadblocks are driving me insane.
I won't be able to turn my Health Forms in on time because there's no way i can get the TB shot in time to have the result s measured. If the fucking doctor's office would have looked at my damned forms instead of putting them in a tray and forgetting about them i wouldn't be in this situation.
That's a lie, well not really a lie but a half truth. I probably wouldn't have been in this situation if i didn't wait til June to start thinking about my health forms.
frustration is a killer.
wuuuusaaaaah
I think everyone lives their lives hidden behind a facade of competence.
Or at least i know that i do.
Let me tell you how i see it.
In an effort to persuade your family and friends of your ability to do something, you convince yourself that you are indeed capable. You take on tasks that you know you are incapable of completing and when you realize this you take on another task to try and overshadow it.
See, i tried to do things on my own. I was doing good up until a certain point. I had a job, I applied to a school, i got accepted, I filled out my forms.
HOORAY for me, i was on a sweet buttered roll.
Now i'm the forgotten crumbs on a stained, rusted platter.
Now all the problems arise and i'm wishing that i had another trick up my sleeve so that i could sink behind my facade.
When i think about it, instead of cracking under the pressure i create for myself I should look to someone else for help and guidance.
HELP!
Asking for, and offering help is one of the most underestimated acts of kindness there is.
The pressure of everyday situations can be assuaged by breaking down your ego. I wish it was that simple to do though.
I poke my chest out, exhale bravado and say:
"I NEED NO ONE'S HELP"
I'm lying.
Sometimes i wish someone knew that i wanted help. I wish that someone would offer without me having to ask.
But at the same time I know that in reality, i've got to get rid of my facade, open my mouth
and be heard.
"word."
W T F!@#@#
I don't even want to think about it. I'm in this zone where i feel like I should just say forget it and withdraw from attendance. I Just want to go outside and kick bricks or something. Then pull each strand of hair out of my head from frustration.
I'm lying though. i'm not sadistic or into pain at all, so I'll just pray and stick it through.
I have however mailed in all of those forms. These constant roadblocks are driving me insane.
I won't be able to turn my Health Forms in on time because there's no way i can get the TB shot in time to have the result s measured. If the fucking doctor's office would have looked at my damned forms instead of putting them in a tray and forgetting about them i wouldn't be in this situation.
That's a lie, well not really a lie but a half truth. I probably wouldn't have been in this situation if i didn't wait til June to start thinking about my health forms.
frustration is a killer.
wuuuusaaaaah
I think everyone lives their lives hidden behind a facade of competence.
Or at least i know that i do.
Let me tell you how i see it.
In an effort to persuade your family and friends of your ability to do something, you convince yourself that you are indeed capable. You take on tasks that you know you are incapable of completing and when you realize this you take on another task to try and overshadow it.
See, i tried to do things on my own. I was doing good up until a certain point. I had a job, I applied to a school, i got accepted, I filled out my forms.
HOORAY for me, i was on a sweet buttered roll.
Now i'm the forgotten crumbs on a stained, rusted platter.
Now all the problems arise and i'm wishing that i had another trick up my sleeve so that i could sink behind my facade.
When i think about it, instead of cracking under the pressure i create for myself I should look to someone else for help and guidance.
HELP!
Asking for, and offering help is one of the most underestimated acts of kindness there is.
The pressure of everyday situations can be assuaged by breaking down your ego. I wish it was that simple to do though.
I poke my chest out, exhale bravado and say:
"I NEED NO ONE'S HELP"
I'm lying.
Sometimes i wish someone knew that i wanted help. I wish that someone would offer without me having to ask.
But at the same time I know that in reality, i've got to get rid of my facade, open my mouth
and be heard.
"word."
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